The Mexican woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge. The two flew to Canada where the Mexican woodpecker successfully pecked the so-called ‘impeckable’ tree almost without breaking a sweat.Both woodpeckers were now terribly confused. How is it that the Canadian woodpecker was able to peck the Mexican tree, and the Mexican woodpecker was able to peck the Canadian tree, yet neither was able to peck the tree in their own country?After much woodpecker pondering, they both came to the same conclusion: Apparently, your pecker gets harder when you’re away from home.This one is compliments of Rick M.Things that you should never say to a woman during an argument:10- Don’t you have some laundry to do or something?9- Aww, you are so cute when you get all ticked off.8- You’re just upset because your a****is beginning to spread.7- Wait a minute -- I get it. What time of the month is it?6- You’re sure you don’t want to consult the great Oprah on this one?5-. In reality, it was probably not more then five seconds before Kay came to my rescue. "She makes a cute kitten, doesn’t she?" Somehow, Kay has this way of breaking the ice. It’s not so much what she says as to how she says it. She can sometimes scare the living daylights out of someone with a single sentence, and yet make someone else feel comfortable, safe, and even loved, with the same words. It’s a talent I envy at times and am always glad I have it on my side. In very little time, she had Cindy making little ‘kitty come here’ noises to which I responded. Not that I still wasn’t trembling with humiliation, but somehow, it seemed cat-like, and I felt myself slip into my role which made it possible to ignore. Tentatively, I approached Cindy, spent several moments sniffing her fingers and then rubbed my cheek against her hand before retreating to the safety on the other side of Kay’s crossed legs. After a short while, they slipped into the cadence of conversation, and I was perfectly.
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